Are the jeeps getting shorter, or I am getting taller and clumsier?

In November when I moved to my permanent site, I began to ride jeepneys on a regular basis around the city. Although much different than buses in the US, it’s a pretty easy system. But there is a process to riding a jeepney that makes it an art. First, maybe you should see a picture of a jeep.

There it is! Jeepneys in the Philippines began by taking old WWII jeeps and renovating them so that more people could fit in the back. Today, they’ve morphed into much more, being places to display artwork or advertisements.

So, back to the process (Mom, pay attention…you are going to have to do this!).

1. You must know where you want to go and which jeep you can take to get you there. Since I have a pretty awesome host family, I usually ask them if I’m going to a new place which jeep I can take. You can also ask the jeep driver or anyone standing alongside the road, such as a security guard. Also, I’m lucky to live in a city where the jeeps are numbered, thus making it easier to know whether or not you are getting onto the correct jeep.

2. Once you see the jeep that you need, you raise your arm to flag it down. If you don’t do this on time, though, it’s fine because the jeep will stop anyways thinking that they can convince you to get on. The driver might make kissy noises or yell “Heyyy” until you turn and look. Now, it’s important to not raise your hand like you would in the US to flag a cab. Put your arm at a 45 degree angle (usually the right arm, since that is the arm facing the road). Bend the wrist as if you have no control over what your hand is doing, and just flop the hand. It takes a while to get used to, but it’s actually a quite fun way to beckon someone.

3. Once the jeep sees the flopping hand (or just pulls over anyways), head to the back of the jeep to get in. There will usually be a conductor, who is in charge of making sure everyone is situated, has gotten rid of their personal bubble space, and pays the correct fare. If the jeep is crowded, the conductor will point to which side you should sit on or where you might find a small triangle of room for your hinder to fit into. Now, when you get in, make sure to hang onto your bag so that it doesn’t hit anyone in the face or throw you off balance while you are trying to get to your seat (in a jeep that is possibly in motion by this point). Also, watch where your feet are going, because if you step on someone’s foot, it could also throw your balance off and subsequently throw you face-first into the first available seat and/or all the passengers sitting there. Ladies, it is also important to hold the front of your shirt if it is at all low-cut, and the same goes for your lower back if it might reveal itself during entrance to the jeep. During all this, of course you must be crouching down and watching where your head is, because if you are 5’6” or taller, you will smack your head on the roof at least 50% of the time. If you’ve never succeeded at multi-tasking, give up and take a taxi.

4. If you do end up smacking your head, it often helps to give a small chuckle and a dramatic, “Aguy,” or, “Ouch.” This will help to determine the overall atmosphere of the jeep. If people stare at you as if you are an alien that just dropped out of the sky, put your sunglasses on and be prepared to mind your own business. Sometimes, however, others on the jeep will give you a pitied look or a look that says that they understand. One time, a friendly gentleman even commented on how tall I was. So if that happens, it helps to create a sense of community amongst the jeepney riders. For the rest of the ride, you should feel at home and comfortable.

5. Sometime during your ride, you will be responsible for paying your fare. Now, it usually depends on the person’s preference as to when you pay it. Some people enter a jeep and pay the conductor almost immediately, while others will wait until they are leaving. I usually take the advice of my host sister, who doesn’t pay until she’s almost to her destination. That way, if the jeep gets a flat tire or the driver decides to take a lunch break, you still have your fare to pay a different jeep. It’s best if you have exact change, but if you don’t, that’s okay too. Pass your money towards the back of the jeep (or towards the driver if there is no conductor—the driver will multitask and make change while driving busy roads, impressive). When others are passing in their fare down to the conductor, I usually stick out my hand to help—it’s seems to sometimes garner a bit of respect, since everyone is wondering why you are there anyways. If you don’t have exact change, you should tell the conductor where you are going and where you are coming from. He can then calculate the fare in his mind and pass back the correct change. Since you are a foreigner, though, chances are that at least 5% of your rides, you will have to actually ask for your change. You will sit patiently for a while, knowing that sometimes it does take a while for change to be handed back. However, when you notice that someone else who paid after you has received their change, at that point it’s okay to say, “Dong, wa pa ko’y sukli,” or “Young man, I don’t have my change yet.” Realizing that you speak the language and therefore know the correct jeepney fares, he’ll grudgingly pass you the two or three coins.

6. Once you have your change, you can sit back and relax. Once you get close to your destination (if you don’t quite know where you’re going, tell the conductor and he will make sure that you get off at the right spot), you have a few choices. You can either yell, “Lugar lang,” which means literally, “Just this place.” You can also choose to make kissy noises to the driver or utilize coins to bang on the bars above. The other option is to knock on the roof to get the driver’s attention. They’ll pull over to the side of the road (or stop in the middle) so that you can get out. Follow the same guidelines as before—hang onto your bags, watch your feet, watch your head, hold your shirt, etc. Step down, and jump out.

7. Congrats! You’ve done it.

8. Some other things to keep in mind…always keep your bag on your lap with your arms over it…make sure you know what your neighbors are doing…get over the whole “personal bubble” thing, it doesn’t exist here…you might want to bring a handkerchief to cover your mouth in order to keep the exhaust out of your lungs…hang onto the upper bar, or you might go flying into your neighbor…and last but not least, be nice.

So that’s the jeepney experience in a nutshell! It takes a couple rides to get used to it, but eventually it’s just a normal, everyday activity. As much as I do love the jeeps, there are some days that I would trade one in for a nice, clean bus with big windows and comfortable seats that has specific stops and contributes much less air pollution to our atmosphere. But heck, being able to experience that again will come soon enough!